Sifted Like Wheat

Sometimes when I think of Satan I think of some spirit in some far off land. I think of something not in my life physically. Something that, perhaps, is not in my reality. Then something happens and I am reminded that he most certainly is real and actively in my life.

When times start going well, is when I have learned to worry. Especially when my relationship with my husband is going super well, I am waiting for it. The last thing Satan wants is for us is to be happy, to uphold our covenants and make it to the celestial kingdom. When he sees that we are doing well he is going to tempt us and try to break us apart.  It could be a look, a word, a tone, a memory, a disappointment. Anything. No matter how big or little the issue he can try to use against you. He will use whatever he knows about you and use that against you. If it is addiction, depression, anger. He knows you. 

A few weeks ago I was hit really hard. I knew it was Satan immediately which helped me tremendously. He was trying to sift me like wheat.  I never truly understood the emotional aspect of the scripture when Jesus was talking to Peter about how Satan wanted to sift him like wheat.  I understood that the wheat berry is separated from the stalk and chaff. It literally tears the wheat apart. It is a violent process.  I now understand the emotional part. I was literally being torn apart and it was an internal, violent process. I knew I was being tested to see if I'd say "screw it, I'm doing what I want and I am no longer living the Gospel" or if I would stay faithful. 

I have never been through anything like that before. It made Satan a reality. It made all the times I had heard people say that "we are at war" a reality. We truly are at war. Constantly. Every Day. The armor of God is real to me now. It is a primary concept, I know, but I have a testimony of it. As we go through our struggles that is where our testimonies and our faith is strengthened. As we come out of the darkness and see the light, we know we have chosen the right side. 

As we go throughout our days putting on our armor of God let us not forget Joshua 1:9 "Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest." 

Godly Sorrow is Good, Worldly Sorrow Bad

As Latter-Day Saints we understand that this life is a test. We are here to be tested and tried in our faith and our obedience.  We can suffer from physical pain, which in itself can hamper our quality of life and mood. We can suffer from psychological and emotional difficulties. I have suffered from both and for me, personally, the mind has been the hardest to overcome. Thoughts slip in and out. Irritability, anger, guilt, depression. 

Our Spirits are made up of our Heavenly Father and Mother. We are sons and daughters of God! We all stumble and get discouraged. Our biggest lessons are from our biggest mistakes. We have the most growth when we push through the hard times with our head up and doing those things that are pleasing to Heavenly Father. When we keep our faith and obedience during hard times He is pleased. He is pleased when we mess up and repent and try harder next time. He didn't send us here to be perfect, but to become perfected (maybe that should be another post). 

Sometimes I get so warped and wrapped up in a mistake I become consumed. As President Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, "But there is an important difference between the sorrow for sin that leads to repentance and the sorrow that leads to despair." The Apostle Paul taught that "godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation...but the sorrow of the world worketh to death." 

True repentance will be transforming. The broken heart and contrite spirit (Godly sorrow) that is felt when you have sinned brings you to repentance. When the guilt brings us to self-loathing and prevents us from rising up (I have been there) then it is impeding our repentance. Bad things happen, we make bad choices sometimes, but the atonement is a light. It is a beautiful thing. When I start with the self-loathing and I am stuck in chains I know it is Satan. There is no light there. I am too stubborn to let him win. I do my best to recognize it for what it is, pray to my Heavenly Father and get a blessing if I feel I need one. 

There is light even in darkness. I have to say, do not let Satan win. Satan wants us to believe we are no good and we can't do it. Satan can hit the hardest when you are doing the most good. When you are doing the Lord's work and building His kingdom Satan wants nothing more than to get you to stop or to rip your family apart.

This life is hard, but we can find joy. It is our choice. You can't go wrong with the Lord on your side. We all have our own battles we are fighting, so let's be gentle with one another.

Dads Are Capable

     There is a difference between a Father and a Father who has become a Dad. Those, naturally or with effort, who are Dads are capable. They are much more capable than t.v., media, and bad jokes give them. 

     They sacrifice, serve and pray for their children just like Moms do. They also have the duty of providing and protecting. Some Dad's protect this country so we can keep our freedoms. Some Dad's are businessmen and have to deal with headaches all day. Some Dad's are business owners and have to deal with even more headaches all day. Some Dad's work construction and work their body to death. Some Dad's are able to work at home and have to balance work and family life at the same time. There are a million different jobs that Dad's do, but when they walk in those doors and enter their homes they take on their role as Dad.

     Dad's help out with the housework, cooking, dishes and bedtime. They brush hair, help make lunches and have teaching moments. They change dirty diapers and clean up vomit (thank goodness). They watch the kids so we can get some time away. They seem to do all this with a special flare. As I watch my husband there is something remarkable, something sacred about what he is doing. He is fulfilling his calling, he is progressing and becoming more like our loving Heavenly Father. 

    Dad's aren't just capable. They are much more than that. They have problem solving, innovative  minds. They think of things that we never would. They make our lives easier. They are brilliant with their ideas. They are creative. They play with the kids in ways that we don't. That is what is so fun. They are strong and courageous; ready to protect. 

    Dad's love their families. They are honest, loyal and faithful men. To all you men out there that are Dad's: You blow my mind! You are awesome! You are exactly what we need and you help pick up our slack when we are overwhelmed. You encourage us and wipe our tears. You are our yang and complete our circle. Our kids are lucky to have a real man as their Dad.